Kyle Korver in Fresher Times

No I am not selling any. Geez ladies.

But according to this morning’s Deseret News, Kyle Korver has been wearing the same underwear for 45 days. Oh you heard me right. But don’t take it from me. Listen to Kyle:

Kyle Korver's Underwear

“I had some friends just kind of go in my closet and grab some stuff and ship it out. But it’s just, like, the little things that you don’t want them digging through … little stuff like that that I haven’t had in the last 45 days. Like … clean drawers.”

Because you know that in Salt Lake city they don’t sell underwear. Maybe an NBA player wouldn’t be caught dead buying them in bulk at Walmart, but SLC has plenty of upscale stores where a Baller could purchase some Shaq-brand silk drawers. Heck Andre Kirilenko’s wife would probably sell him some. Wouldn’t that be preferable to wearing the same pair for 45 days?

Maybe he is just doing it in an attempt to keep the defenders off him. It isn’t working, though. They stick to him like glue. He has to scrape them off on Matt Harpring to get open.

The other thing that Salt Lake is missing is dry cleaners. Actually folks I am just kidding around with Deformio. There are plenty of dry cleaners available.

Here is a list.

City Dry Cleaners – – (801) 466-2241

Henrie’s Dry Cleaners – – (801) 328-8789

Red Hanger Cleaners: Stores – – (801) 532-7143

Classic Cleaners – – (801) 355-1725

One Hour Martinizing – – (801) 466-3010

Kyle they may even restore your old underpants here:

Henrie’s Dry Cleaners: Certified Restoration – (801) 363-2653

Ok, now you may be wondering why I am savaging one of my favorite players. You see, folks according to that article it looks like Kyle was actually extended an invitation to be part of the 3-point shooting contest at the NBA Allstar game and declined because he still wanted to pick up some stuff he left behind in Philly and didn’t want his friends going through his underwear drawers. Link to same Desnews article HERE.

So our good pal Deformio skips out on the 3-point shootout for underwear? Why? Do we no longer have moving companies in America that a multi million dollar player could afford to use? Maybe there just aren’t any in Philladelphia. Let me check . . . Oh wait:

Kyle Korver Movers

Mambo Movers – – (215) 670-9535

Goggin Moving & Storage – – (215) 877-7618

Movers by Old City Movers – – (267) 205-5209

Alacrity Equipment Movers – – (215) 825-7696

The A-Team Movers – – (215) 232-8326

Fox Piano Movers Inc – – (215) 592-8411

Apioneer Moving Systems – – (215) 493-8296

Advance Storage Company: Toll Free Outside PA 1-800 523-2723 (215) 765-6500

Extra Space Storage: Philadelphia – – (215) 455-2880

Penske Truck Rental Philadelphia – – (215) 922-2702 –

As a fan, I would have liked to see Kyle Korver Kick butt in the 3-point contest. Instead we get Kobe, Richard Hamilton, Daniel Gibson, Jason Kapono, and Nash. Some of those guys belong in that contest but I think Korver could have beat them all.

Now my wife just grabbed me by the ear and said, “Blah blah rah rah blah yadda blah rah!”


She told me to tell you guys what is possibly the other side of the story. She says that she is sure that Kyle just wants to go and see his family and put his life in order. He has been living in a hotel since coming to the Jazz for goodness sake. With all the games and travel and practices, he hasn’t been able to stop and breathe, much less do his laundry. Besides, he minght need to spend time with his family or girlfriend or whatever. In conclusion “Blah Yadda Blah Blah.”

BTW, possible Kyle Korver girlfriend sighting here folks:

Kyle Korver Girlfriend

Well all I know is that since being on the Jazz, Kyle has helped stabilize the team. We have gone 17-3. That’s frickin’ awesome. He kicks butt and takes names. Even if his shooting touch is still just a little off, that still makes him one of the best shooters in the league.

So is it selfish for me to want to see him beat the crap out of Kobe in the 3-point shooting contest?

Oh wait, I have another possible Kyle Korver girlfriend sighting. Or should I say Girlfriends? That’s right, guys. He’s got TWINS!!!

Kyle Korver Girlfriends