Hello! Kingju1ce again!

I Would Like that on the Side

 

Do you understand my foot

 

My wife and I will go to fast food restaurants just a few times a month, and during these special times of Whoppers and Big Macs, I have learned to be careful what I say.  I am a “Super Size” supporter (who has recently had my dreams crushed…curse you Super Size Me documentary!!) and now that I can only select a large, I find myself leaving these establishments rather peckish (look it up) unless I order something from the Value or Dollar menus (be careful to check which fast food joint you are visiting when using these terms, the people on register are generally one step from postal…this is the same when using the terms Super Size, King Size, Up Size and Biggie Size) to go with my value meal.

 

Ruining the fun for everyone!!

 

So…when I order my value meal (thanks to Darwin we now only have to say a number) I have to add the item I want…(spicy chicken sandwich…whopper jr….you get the idea) and then comes the moment of truth where I must choose my words carefully.  For years I have used this phrase in restaurants (because it is on the menus) and everyone knows what I want or need.  For some reason when I say, “and I would like a spicy chicken sandwich from the dollar menu on the side” I get confused, blank looks at fast food restaurants.  At one point of this happening, my wife got frustrated and told me to use something different because our orders through the drive thru were getting all messed up (we were getting additional extra value meals instead of just the sandwich, etc.). 

 

Maybe my expectations are a little high

 

I mean come on, what the (enter curse word here…unless you don’t curse…and then you will probably use some substitute like “heck” or “freak” or just change the whole phrase to “what’s the deal”)??

 

On a side note…with fuel and food prices being so high…feel free to buy a small fountain drink that we are accustomed to at your local fast food place instead of the large and refill it at your leisure.  Don’t let these opportunities to save money slip by!

 

So…Who’ve I Got Here?

 

NO! WHO'VE I GOT HERE?

 

This one is used by one of my friends and coworkers.  I love to give him a hard time about it.  Part of our job is to answer phone calls from truckers who work in Portland, Seattle and Vancouver, B.C. and my friend likes to use “So who’ve I got here?” when he is trying to see which trucking company is calling him.  Like my “on the side” phrase, there are times that people understand what he is saying so he continues to add this phrase to his regular rotation of things to say.  However, there are many times (especially when is helping to cover the guy’s desk who controls Vancouver, B.C.) where the truckers do not understand him and he gets frustrated when he has to change it up.  I don’t think they teach the word “who’ve” in India English classes.

 

Actual image from Vancouver trucker strike resolution

 

The bottom line is, even if we are right…it does us no good to use these phrases if the people we are trying to communicate with have no idea what we are saying!!  So shame on them from not knowing what we mean and shame on us for being the minority and expecting the general public to succumb to our will!

 

Hanjin this is Justin!

 

Jeff is waiting to assist you

 

When I answer the phone at work I answer, “Hanjin…this is Justin” but I guess that in my excitement to talk on my phone I say it quickly.  A very common response to my salutation is “Yes Jeff, I wondering if you could help me”.  I know I say it correctly but I guess those I am saying it to are hearing something different.  The name Justin isn’t a complicated one and is easily pronounced however, my pronunciation of my own name must emphasize the Ju- and I must trail off with the –stin.  This is the only explanation that I can find.

 

Poor Jeff

 

If I have a bad day I am sure that a phone call may go like this…

 

Me: Hanjin this is Justin

Caller: Hi Jeff! Say I was wondering if you could help me…

(10 seconds go by)

Caller: Hello?  Hello!

Me: Oh I am sorry I thought you were talking to Jeff.  We are on a conference call right?

Caller: Wh-what?

Me: Yeah my name is JUSTIN!

 

Or with my sense of humor a call could go more like this…

 

Me: Hanjin this is Justin

Caller: Hi Jeff! This is Joe, say I was wondering if you could help me…

Me: Sure Bo, I would be more than happy to help you..

Caller: No I’m sorry, my name is Joe

Me: Oh and my name is JUS-TIN, its nice to meet you!

 

Drew Carey: “Oh no! I have to say all this as we go to commercial?”

Little harsh...but how is this guy rich?!

 

Drew Carey doesn’t have a phrase that is hard to understand but instead he tries to say a lot of words with his mouth without the cooperation of his brain…

 

Here are some examples of Drew Carey struggling to talk on the show Whose Line is it Anyway…

 

Ryan catches Drew in the act and the everything goes out of control

 

and at the end of this clip…

 

Ok just pick any clip with an intro or outro with this guy…

 

Therefore I propose that everyone adopt the saying, “he really screwed that up…it was worse than Drew Carey on four hours sleep”

 

King

Addition by Edgwriter:

I’m sorry but I just had to come on here and say Rowsdower:

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